Guidelines

Welcome! Please read our "Vision and Values" to see what our site is about. It is important to have a safe community where all are welcome. Listed below are the guidelines for the chat rooms and forums. Thank you for helping to keep the site safe. We hope to see you in chat and in the forums soon!

1. Be Supportive - We want all who enter these rooms to feel safe and supported. Please remember that we are all survivors, each at a different point in our healing.
2. Be Respectful - Gossiping or talking about another member is not appropriate and it will not be tolerated.
3. Be Honest and Trustworthy - Trust can be a difficult issue for many survivors of abuse and other trauma. Be worthy of our members’ trust.
4. Respect Boundaries - Boundaries are very critical for most abuse survivors and essential to recovery. It is important that survivors learn how to set and enforce their own boundaries.
5. Use Self Care – It is important to take responsibility for yourself, recognize your own triggers, and develop healthy coping strategies.

1. The site admins are here to keep the site safe for everybody. Please listen to and follow their instructions. If you have any concerns please contact Lisa via email.
2. Don’t give out your full name, address, phone number, or any identifiable information.
3. Under no circumstances may any adult member of this site arrange an off-line meeting with any minor in our community.
4. Chat Room 5 - Adults Only. You must be 18 years or older to use chat room 5. This room may contain discussions of a sexual nature.
5. There is to be absolutely no cybersex or porn at this site.
6. Do not use the word admin or host in your nickname. Chat room admins will appear in blue letters in the user list.
7. Do not come into the room under the influence of alcohol or drugs.
8. Do not threaten suicide or self-injury. We are not equipped to deal with crises of this nature. Contact your local crisis hotline instead, call 1-800-SUICIDE, or check out helpful sites on the web. Talking about feelings and coping strategies is ok, but threats of carrying out those actions are not allowed here.

1. Listen carefully to what others are saying before you draw conclusions.
2. Some people can be triggered by certain words or names. While self care is ultimately their own responsibility, we may be able to help support them. We use spoilers (also called softeners) in chat rooms 1 and 3, as well as certain forums, for words that are common triggers. Please click here for more information.
3. Always ask in the room before sending a private chat box (p2p).
4. Never log in to two of our chat rooms at the same time - only be logged in once, in one room.
5. Try not to bombard new people with a bunch of personal questions (including "A/S/L"). Be gentle, let them get comfortable. Remember how scared you were the first time you entered a chat like this! Likewise, if you do not feel comfortable answering any question, say so.
6. Learn how to use the "Ignore" function in the chat rooms. Taking control over who has access to you will aid in your recovery. On the user list, simply right click on the person's name and click on the 'Ignore' option.
7. Our site is only for survivors and their friends and family. Please, no requests for research information.

• We realize that religion can be very important in healing for many survivors. As such, you are free to discuss your religious beliefs and their influence in your healing. Please, however, be aware that religious discussions can get out of hand rather quickly and they need to be handled sensitively.
• Examples of not following the guidelines:
• Being overly preaching. Telling people what they "should" believe.
• Not respecting someones views and beliefs
• Believing in whatever you believe in is exactly that, its what YOU believe in. What's right for one, may not be right for another. It's all a matter of choice. We are all survivors that come from many different paths. Be respectful.
• Because religion can be a sensitive subject, please be aware of others' personal boundaries and beliefs, before you post religious content. We do have a folder in the forums to have religious discussions, "Fountain of Faith". It is for all beliefs and views.
• If a situation arises where the topic becomes hostile or triggering, please exercise self care.
• Try to use statements like "this is what I believe" rather than "it is a fact" when putting forward your opinions.
• If you feel that its a situation that you feel you have been not been respected, or feel that someone has "gone over the line", please feel free to email one of the admins at admin@survivorschat.com so we may address it accordingly.

• Most of our moderated chats are held in the password-protected rooms 3 and 4.
• For everybody’s safety, passwords will only be given to members who have been actively posting in the forums for at least 30 days.
• For more information and to request access to these chats, please see the FAQ page in the forums.

• Admins are not counselors. We're not perfect, we have good days and bad days just like everybody else. We're not therapists, we're just here to keep the site running and as safe as possible. This site should not be used as a replacement for seeking professional help.

Thanks
Lisa, BA, Biz, Bluebear, LP, Mitote, Softwinds and Triste

Legal & Privacy